Anguish

Before his crucifixion, as Jesus was alone in the garden with Father, He experienced intense anguish. So much so that He sweated drops of blood. This is a documented medical condition known as Hematidrosis. It occurs at times of extreme anguish. What could cause the God/Man to react so?

It was the result of the struggle between His humanity and His Spirit. In the garden Jesus stated, “Father, if you are willing, remove this cup from me; yet not my will, but yours be done” (Luke 22:39-46). What cup was Jesus referring to? It was His upcoming betrayal, torture and eventual death. He asked His father to rescue Him from what His humanity would endure.

In this, once again, Jesus demonstrates His sympathy with us (Hebrews 4:15). Every disciple experiences the struggle between the flesh and God’s Spirit. This resides at the heart of living with Jesus. The will, desires, longings, wishes, hopes, dreams, etc, of our humanity stands opposed to His will, desires longings, wishes, hopes, and dreams. Letting go of our humanness is hard. To do so involves dying to self, the taking up of a cross, and the decrease of one’s identity. Our humanity is all we know. This is why it doesn’t want to let go.

However, as we release ourselves to Jesus, we find a new reality. One in which there is a recognition that our previous desires, longings, etc. were our attempts to achieve what is found in only in Him. Cheep substitutes for the real thing. Passing attempts at finding a lasting satisfaction.

In our struggle, the follower of Jesus is aided by the Holy Spirit. It is not the conscience that stirs the heart. What whispers in the ear is the Spirit of God. One must learn to accept that guilt and conviction that He brings. To ignore Him is what the Bible reveals to be a hardening of the heart, a growing insensitivity to the Spirit of God. We do not want this. The solution to the conviction we experience is to confess, repent, and restore our relationships with Jesus.

Having walked The Way, when we depart the path and find ourselves in the rough, among the weeds and rocks. It will hurt to get back on the clear and smooth path. But, don’t be deterred. The short-term pain is nothing compared to the peace and fulfillment of walking with Jesus.